I am so grateful to be sober today. I'm grateful for the chance to relax over the weekend. I'm grateful for the opportunity to rebuild and to change. I'm grateful for my new sponsor and for the work we did together on Sunday. I'm grateful for hope and time spent together.
Good morning my friends and happy Monday! Always grateful to be starting the week off with you beautiful people and I hope you all had a lovely weekend filled with rest, relaxation and rejuvenation :)
I started working with a new sponsor a little over two weeks ago and over the weekend we started reading the Big Book together. Now first of all, I absolutely adore my new sponsor. My first two sponsors were women who I was very fortunate to be connected to through other people. But with my new sponsor, I heard her qualify at my favorite 10am 11th Step meeting on a Sunday and for the first time ever, from the moment she started speaking to the moment she stopped I just wanted everything she has.
A moment like that hadn't happened for me before, I was a little nervous if I was making the right decision - letting go of my old sponsor, but in my heart I knew what was right for me.
So as I said, we started reading the book together on Sunday and right off the bat she’s left me with a lot to think about. First of all, as I’m sure everyone here knows, I have a hard time with the difference between belief in God and dependence upon him. But something I learned over the weekend is, the process of moving into dependence from belief doesn’t have to look so linear. It doesn’t have to be overnight and I can start to depend in whatever way works for me.
With that said, this morning I sat down and said a few formal prayers followed but a very honest conversation with God. My meditative practice for today is being here writing to you, and throughout the day whenever I need it, I can keep talking to my Higher Power. But to know that to pray doesn’t mean I always have to be on my knees, to meditate doesn’t always have to be with my eyes closed and legs crossed, is really comforting to me.
I’ve already unloaded quiet a bit onto you guys this fine Monday morning which I swear I didn’t mean to ;) So with that, I hope you all have a lovely day, you continue to do your daily practices the way that suits you best, and I'll see you guys again on Thursday!
With so much love always,
Jane