Hello, my name is Tommy, and I am a grateful, recovering alcoholic.1 In Chapter 1, I attempted to paint a picture of what we would cover in future chapters. I also made it clear that I firmly believe The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is the definitive source of information and direction on AA’s Twelve-Step Recovery Program so it is there we will begin our journey together.
If you are reading this from the perspective of a Newcomer, or someone who has tried to achieve sobriety ion the past and failed, you may be asking yourself who is this guy or what is AA. AA is
Not an organization in the conventional sense of the word. The only requirement for membership is an honest desire to stop drinking. We are not allied with any sect or denomination, nor do we oppose anyone. We simply wish to be helpful to those who are affected.
Big Book, pp. xiii-xiv
What we need to share is
The tremendous fact for everyone of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the great news this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism.
Big Book, p. 17
Before one can accept, they have a particular affliction, it is necessary to understand the symptoms of the suspected illness sufficient to make an accurate diagnosis. A correct diagnosis is critical to understand what the appropriate course of treatment will then be, if a treatment exists. for the illnes An added consideration is whether this is a disease that can be completely cured with a recommended course of treatment, or whether it is a chronic condition that can only be controlled but never actually cured.
When Bill W’s advanced alcoholism brought him under the care of Dr. William D. Silkworth for the third time, Dr. Silkworth recounts in an open letter published in the Big Book what Bill shared with him:
To Whom It May Concern:
I have specialized in the treatment of alcoholism for many years.
In late 1934 I attended a patient who, though he had been a competent businessman of the good earning capacity, was an alcoholic of a type I had come to regard as hopeless.
In the course of his third treatment, he acquired certain ideas concerning a possible means of recovery, as part of his rehabilitation he commenced to present his conceptions to other alcoholics, impressing upon them that they must do likewise with still others. This has become the basis of a rapidly growing fellowship of these men and their families. This man and over one hundred others appear to have recovered.
I personally know scores of cases who were of the type with whom other methods had failed completely.
These facts appear to be of extreme medical importance; because of the extraordinary possibilities of rapid growth inherent in this group they mark a new epoch in the annals of alcoholism. These men may well have a remedy for thousands of such situations.
You may rely absolutely on anything they say about themselves.
Big Book, p. xxv
I find three things quite remarkable about that passage. First, Dr. Silkworth found it most important to explain that Bill found it essential to immediately pass on to other alcoholics his newfound ideas of rehabilitation and recovery, and that they must do so in turn if it is to be sustained in them. This is before we learn anything about the disease itself or the potential recovery plan that the Big Book will set out in the coming pages. Let’s keep this fact in mind as we uncover the importance of working with another alcoholic and how that is woven throughout every aspect of the AA Program of Recovery. The second amazing thing is that a man of science and medicine is unreservedly endorsing something that has attributes, as we will later see, that go far beyond the world of the physical and scientific and into the realm of psychic change, Bill W. called it a “spiritual awakening.” Last, I do not know about you and your experiences with alcoholism or with an alcoholic, but for someone to be saying these recovered alcoholics’ testimonials about themselves can be relied upon as the gospel truth is quite a remarkable statement. Especially, when applied to individuals who have suffered from a disease that seems to be built upon a framework of lies, self-delusion and denial.
In The Doctors Opinion which begins on page xxv of the Big Book, we learn that the disease of alcoholism centers in both the body and the mind. The physical
Action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy; that the phenomenon of craving is limited to this class and never occurs in the average temperate drinker. These allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all; and once having formed the habit and found they cannot break it, once having lost their self-confidence, their reliance upon things human, their problems pile up on them and become astonishingly difficult to solve.”
Big Book, p xxviii
My own personal story, and my experiences working the Program for myself and with other alcoholics, have taught me that the only treatment for the physical allergy part of this disease is complete abstinence. I say this with sympathy for your and my prior self-experimentation all of which taught me in painful ways that no form of moderation or highly regimented controlled drinking could overcome this basic truth. Every time I picked up a drink, the phenomenon of physical craving for the next drink would kick in. Each additional drink just made me crave the next drink even more. This is not normal, and this is not how alcohol affects non-alcoholics. True alcoholics at some point in their drinking career lose all control over the amount they drink, or their ability to stop drinking once they start. Sadly, this point of no return is very often reached long before an alcoholic begins the soul crushing effort of trying to stop under their own unaided efforts.
The way alcohol worked in my system was very much like the alcoholic who walked into a local bar one day. Much to his delight, a sign over the bar read “All you can drink for 1 Dollar.” Smiling, the alcoholic called the Barman over and politely said “I’ll have 2 Dollars-worth please.”
That is the mind and the body of an alcoholic in action. The disease is progressive in nature whether one is actively drinking or not. What that means is that even after long periods of abstinence it is highly likely that your return to drinking will lead to greater volumes of consumption and attendant consequences. It also means that each relapse will take you to a new bottom and a higher level of consumption with greater rapidity after every slip.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step of recovery…. We are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control….Most of us have been unwilling to admit we are real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is mentally and bodily different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove that we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someway he will control his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.”
Big Book, p. 30
The good news is that not picking up a drink will prevent the cycle of physical craving (the allergy) from being activated all over again leading to a spree and incomprehensible demoralization that so many of us experience after drinking after just firmly resolving not to do so. The sad reality is that if we never picked up that first drink again there would be no need for the Big Book or my column. A person who discovered they were an alcoholic would merely need to not pick up another drink. However, something happens to the alcoholic in their mind before they pick up that next drink-a form of mental obsession. What many in AA describe as the mental insanity that precedes the first drink. It is with this mental state we find ourselves in before we pick up that first drink that we will come to better understand. We will also learn how to build a defense against that mental state.
In the next chapter, we will look at Bill Wilson’s story (pp. 1-16), I will share a bit about my story, and we will have a few excerpts from the story of Jim (pp. 35-38). Jim’s story is one of my favorites. I am hopeful that you will be able to reflect on these stories to determine if you believe you may be an alcoholic who could benefit from what the AA Program of Recovery has to offer. If you have a Big Book, I suggest while waiting for Chapter 3 you review pages 20-21 to see if one of the three types of drinkers described fits your situation. If you do not have a copy of The Big Book you can access the complete text here.
Until next time, wishing you always receive that which you need, even if it’s not initially what you want……..
Your Sponsor
You may have heard my interview with Randall in Breakfast with an Alcoholic: Episode 19:
or you may have already read Chapter 1 of And Now a Word from Your Sponsor:
Excellent article - very informative - I look forward to reading the posts asI have time and appreciate the work involved in helping alcoholics
Absolutely- very grateful you are here to do this!