I’m grateful for the way summer is ending. I’m grateful for soft light in the mornings. I’m grateful for seeing the way things were. I’m grateful for seeing that I was what was making me unhappy. I’m grateful for a family wedding this weekend. I’m grateful for the peace and beauty in my life these days. I’m grateful to be sober today.
I’ve mentioned Shaggy the Yoga Instructor in this space before. He teaches a class on Wednesdays that I’ve been going to on the regular for more than a year. Shaggy is not his real name,1 I think he closely resembles “Shaggy” from Scooby-Doo.2 Shaggy is a truly great yoga instructor and the fact that he’s also from Eastern Iowa makes him extra groovy. But what I love most about Wednesday mornings is that Shaggy almost always says some amazing stuff. Also, Shaggy was with me in the locker room on a certain momentous occasion. No, not the time God talked to me, it was when we saw Neil Patrick Harris.
Shaggy is the one who said “you can’t choose your outcomes in life, but you can choose how you experience them.” That unlocked a lot for me. I seriously wish I had a notebook with me on the mat because he says something interesting and worthwhile every week. Yesterday, at the end, as everyone was doing their Savasana pose, Shaggy started talking about how we were all floating at that moment. I thought, “Shaggy, I don’t know about you, but I’m basically laying on a wooden floor,” which seemed pretty far away from my conception of “floating.”3
Shaggy went on to explain that “floating was intentional” and denoted a state where your presence was maintained without effort or work. I had my eyes closed and thought about that for a second, he was right. Laying on the hard floor allowed me to cease all effort and just be there. I was supported and didn’t have to do anything to maintain my position. When class was over, I grabbed my phone and made a few notes about floating.
Later on, it occurred to me that AA has provided for me in life what the floor provided for me in Yoga class: Moments of complete freedom. That freedom comes from knowing that I’m supported and knowing that my life has a purpose. One characteristic of the Me-centric universe: A lot of time is spent living on a tightrope and there are really unpleasant consequences below. In that world, “floating” is the thing thing you do right before you hit bottom.
On Wednesdays, Shaggy puts me through my paces and there are always moments that remind me of the scenes in Westerns where they tie someone’s legs to two different horses and then fire a gun. The reward for all of that hard work is a few sweaty moments at the end, laying on a hard floor. The past already happened. I’m free and relaxed and ready for whatever is coming next. I’m floating.
Thanks for Letting Me Share
In God’s World, everyone is precisely placed to be of maximum service. In my world, everyone has a nickname. If you’re a friend of mine and you don’t know your nickname…
I’ve shared enough of my trivial obsessions, but Scooby Doo started when I was a kid and I did kind of love it. The fact that they were still making new Scooby Doo episodes when my kids were little blows my mind. How much do you think the Scooby Doo franchise is worth? Even after the Scrappy Doo Debacle.
For the record, Shaggy doesn’t know that I call him '“Shaggy.” Also for the record, I think he’d be cool with it.
Needed these words to start my day-- it reminds me of how Julia Cameron says, "Jump and the net will appear" in the Artist's Way. Believing in a supportive universe helps manifest one. Love your words and insight! Thank you for sharing!
Floating. What a nice way to describe recovery. Thanks Shaggy.