Have You Ever Felt Excited, Driven and Drained All At Once?
Why I'm grateful for Step Four.
I am so grateful to be sober today. I’m grateful for the new hat I bought that makes me laugh, for seeing my sponsor yesterday and for starting part two of my resentments. I’m grateful for the things that get me excited like launching our very own website, for a friend’s birthday coming up this weekend, for learning to catch myself when I’m starting to spiral and for cappuccinos.
Happy Monday friends! As always, I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend, has already had their first cup of coffee and you are ready to tackle this Monday…I’m not ready to tackle this Monday FYI.
I know I’ve been alluding to some exciting things happening here at Sober HQ and if you read T.B. D’s Sunday Gratitude Extravaganza yesterday, you now know we are launching our own website!!
All the concepting we’ve been doing, all the extremely talented people we have been working with has truly made me feel the most passion and drive I have felt in a very long time. In addition to tackling this Monday, I hope you all are excited for what’s to come from Thanks for Letting Me Share.
And alongside this rediscovered passion and drive many of you know I’ve been in the trenches of Step four for the past few weeks. Over the weekend I finally finished writing all the people I resent out and why. The total number was 51 resentments for anyone who was keeping track a home.
I met with my sponsor yesterday and part two of writing these resentments is now writing out my part in them, my character defects, have I ever done this to someone else, and what would my Higher Power have me be.
Step 4 can be emotionally draining and challenging, but I can’t wait to be on the other side of it. My sponsor and I did one full one together as practice and what came out of it was – I wasn’t honest about my boundaries, I took things way to personal, yes, I have behaved the same way towards other people, and my Higher Power would have me be honest, forgiving, patient, understanding and they would have me remember that the other person is sick and suffering just like me. (This is the abbreviated version of what we did, and I needed my sponsors help in pointing out of some of my defects. The person we did together is a resentment that has been building for four years so it was a doozy.)
Overall, there’s so much excitement. Excitement for who we are here at Thankflms, for getting through Step four, for a fresh week where new things to come to life, for being a sick person getting better, not a bad person getting good.
I hope you all are excited too, and if anyone is having a bad day and not feeling the excitement, I promise it will pass and the happiness will be back. Sending so much love always and I will see you again on Thursday!
xx,
Jane
Jesus. Whatever happened to: The first rule of Sober HQ...
Love the hat. Now in Al-anon so fun to have "Serenity" on the other side?